Was It All A Dream??

So yesterday I woke up and asked myself-"Did I really sign up for WW's 5k?" "Did I really sign up for 2 hour long workout sessions to get my ass whopped?". I asked myself "what in the hell were you thinking?" Talk about a butt-load of self doubt coming into my mind-Like there is no way you are going to be able to finish a 5k-look at how big you are-do you really think you are going to be able to run any of it? Girl get real-you are totally gonna suck! But I'm doing what Monique told me to "kick that heffa in the chest" lol...I can and will accomplish everything I set out to do! I'm not going to stop at 2 sessions with a personal trainer, but I plan on doing 1-2 a wk at least until my 5k and if money allows until the beginning of July when I plan on going to Chicago. I'm finally starting to get excited about the changes I am going to start seeing in not only my body and how I look at myself!

Weigh In Day!

Well much to my surprise today at my ww meeting--I had actually lost 2.4lbs! I am soo happy and I think this loss is just what I needed to get my ass focused and on tha good foot!
I also just registered for the Walk-It Challenge 5K----O.M.G. I truly can not believe I just did that ,but I did so that means i def have to start training...lawd.lawd.lawd.....I am so nervous about it and its still a good 5 wks away! Nothing like a goal to get and keep you motivated to stay on the straight and narrow! Also-I've decided to get myself a personal trainer to help me reach my goals! I figure maybe if I do a half session and one full session a week or a half one week and then the next week a full session just maybe I will be on the path to achieving my goals~Pray for me!! :)

Weak and Lazy...

That's why I continue to fail at losing weight! I am too lazy to get my butt up and go to the gym consistently...too lazy to meal plan like I knw I should...too lazy to commit and follow thru with what I've started and too weak to continue to always have a fear of failure. But what am I really failing at if I never give it 100% effort? I do know that I am failing at having the life I've always imagined I would. For so long I've used pcos as a crutch as to why I'm not losing weight, but I know better than that bc I have lost weight in the past! Omg...I just need for it to really click in my mind as to why I am doing this....my health and my future-I know losing weight "can" ultimately help me achieve what I want most in this world!

Walk it challenge...

This is my goal...I want that 5k charm...granted I'll have to go to atl to participate in an official ww walk it challenge, but that's fine with me! I have family there that I know will support me...so I guess the next thing to do is register and make it official!

Will it ever CLICK????

Will following the WW plan ever jus f'ing click for me??? When will get truly and utterly sick of my being FAT???!!! I know what I want but I am doing NOTHING to make the moves to get it! That is crazy and really pathetic if I do say so myself!!! THAT IS ALL!!!

My horoscope....

Now I don't necessarily "believe" n all this horoscope stuff but there are times when what it says applies to my life so unbelievably and today's is kinda like that. Now I'm looking at this from the aspect of me trying to lose weight.
Gemini Apr 9 2011 You may have to endure an unpleasant person or situation today if you are to reach a place that is ripe with opportunities and happy experiences. You may hesitate to move forward, though, because you don't want to deal with the negative aspect of this journey. But if you keep your eye on the prize, and you imagine how wonderful the attainment of the goal will be - not to mention all of the perks that go with it - you will find it easier to face your challenges. Just take it a moment at a time, and you'll be fine. -- Copyright (c) DailyHoroscope. Download it now -- http://bit.ly/DHmobile

Feeling blah...

So after an encouraging weigh in on Thursday-I've yet to really fully dive into getn back on track! Sometimes I wonder wtf is wrong with me! I mean this is something that not only do I want but I NEED,but yet I find it so very difficult to commit to this process....omg crazy...Jus crazy! I'm smart enuff to knw tht if I don't put tha work I will never get to where I want to be! So I'm Jus n a BLAH kinda mood....